Territory Wars: Biscuit Edition

So this happened this morning. Marcus went to make the bed and found Biscuit had claimed his entire side like some kind of furry squatter.

Territory Wars: Biscuit Edition

Look at that face - zero remorse, maximum comfort. Marcus stood there for a full five minutes trying to figure out his next move.

The negotiations were… unsuccessful.

The conqueror surveys his domain

Biscuit has perfected the art of selective hearing and dead weight resistance. Seventy-two pounds of ‘I’m not moving and you can’t make me.’ It’s honestly impressive.

The negotiation phase has failed

This is how they compromised. Marcus gets approximately eighteen inches of mattress space and Biscuit gets the rest. The crazy part? Marcus looks genuinely fine with this arrangement. This is what love looks like, people - sharing your bed with a dog who sheds enough to build a second dog.

Biscuit: 1, Marcus: 0. Again.

Compromise achieved

I swear this dog runs this household and we’re all just living in his world.