Coffee in the Driveway

I became a nurse to help people. I still want to help people. But some days I can’t even help myself get out of the car in the driveway.

Coffee in the Driveway

A year of pandemic nursing has taken its toll in ways I’m still figuring out how to talk about. The weight of it sits in my chest when I pull into our driveway after a twelve-hour shift. Sometimes I just need ten minutes to sit there and remember who I am outside of those hospital walls.

Marcus knows. He doesn’t ask questions or try to fix it. He just shows up with coffee and stands there while I collect myself. Yesterday he said ‘Take your time, I’ll be right here’ and I almost cried in the Honda Pilot. This is what love looks like when everything else feels too heavy.

Tonight I’m making his favorite carbonara and we’re watching something mindless on Netflix. Small mercies, you know?