The Day I Knew (Maybe)

OMG you guys. I survived my first day of clinical rotations and I am EMOTIONALLY EXHAUSTED.

The Day I Knew (Maybe)

This is me this morning trying to look confident and professional. Spoiler alert: I was neither.

Getting ready for the big day

Walking into the hospital felt like walking into another world. All these people in scrubs who actually knew what they were doing, and there’s me with my clipboard trying not to trip over my own feet. My instructor assigned me to shadow Nurse Patricia in pediatrics and I thought I was ready. I’ve read every textbook, I’ve practiced on mannequins, I’ve memorized drug interactions until my brain hurt.

But nothing prepares you for seeing actual sick kids. This little boy, maybe 6 years old, was getting his IV changed and he was so brave but you could see he was scared.

First steps into the real world

I made it about two hours before I had to excuse myself to the supply closet and just… lost it. Full ugly cry situation. I felt like such a fraud.

The moment that broke me (and maybe made me)

Then Nurse Patricia found me and instead of telling me to toughen up or that maybe I’m not cut out for this, she just handed me tissues and said “The ones who cry are the ones who care. The ones who care become the best nurses.” I really hope she’s right because I’m pretty sure I’m going to cry a lot more before this is over!